Love Vs. Arranged Marriage! group discussion
Love marriage vs arrange marriage
The question that arises in every Indian youth’s mind is whether to love and marry or prefer to marry and then fall in love? If one decides to go for the love marriage route and is hell bent on finding ‘the One’ in order to live happily ever after, they need to consider the fact that love marriages require equal amount of work put into it for it to be happy and peaceful. Just because love is pre-existing, does not mean that it will continue to be so for eternity. One needs to nurture the love and work on doubling and tripling it for those married moments when it becomes especially difficult to love your partner! While arranged marriages come with greater security with greater involvement of parents, there remains the question of accepting a bunch of almost-stranger as your family for the rest of your life. Also the amount of judgment that the girl or boy has to go through, scrutiny of physical appearance in case of girls and financial status in case of the boys, is a huge deterrent from certain educated people nowadays. Unlike in love marriages, gender-biased roles for both men are women are much more strongly enforced in arranged marriages. There are advantages and disadvantages to both, yet one thing is for sure, the decision of marriage, be it arranged or love, should be taken with careful consideration and much deliberation.
Advantages of Love Marriage :-
- Marriage is a life-long commitment. So, selecting life partner should be in one’s own hands.
- Love is the base for any marriage. In love marriages, there will be no question on whether love happens or not.
- In Love marriages, couple knew each other very well and most probably they already understood each other fully. Hence, there won’t be much conflicts.
- People, who go for love marriage have more choices than those who go for arranged marriage, because arranged marriages mostly happen in between same caste/class/religion people.
- Planned love lives results in happy families.
- Generally, equality prevails in love marriages.
Disadvantages of Love Marriage :-
- The couple who go for love marriage are mostly independent. If they want to get out of the relationship, they do not consider relatives opinions much.
- Love marriages are still socially unacceptable in some parts of India.
- Youngsters may confuse attraction with love.
- Love is not the only thing we need in life. One should also check the reality like the family background, economical conditions, the environment they grew up in etc.
Advantages of Arranged Marriage :-
- In Arranged marriages, parents do inquire about each other’s family and their circle. So, there is a high probability that one will get into a relationship with a similar kind of family as theirs.
- Parents or well-wishers think about the future and economical conditions.
- Couple most likely think about both of their families. So, they will learn to adjust, which is a very good quality for any relationship.
- According to a research conducted by Dr. Robert Epstein, love in arranged marriages tends to fade away with time, whereas love in arranged marriages grows with time.
Disadvantages of Arranged Marriage :-
- Arranged marriage is like a lottery. Love may or may not blossom between the couple.
- Couple do not know each other well, if they spend less time together before marriage. If they have many differences to an extent that they cannot live together, marriage will break.
- In the name of arranged marriages, forced marraiges are still prevalent in many parts of India.
- Too much submissiveness to elders may restrict couple from divorcing, even if they do not have love in between them anymore.
- People who go for arranged marriage may not be that comfortable to discuss everything in detail before marraige. This may cause problems after marriage.
- Though divorce rate is less in arranged marriages compared to love marriages, it cannot be said that they are happily married.
Whether it is love or arranged marriage, relationship will work only if both the partners are serious and honest in the reationship. Life partner must be selected according to their own will and not by force. These days, in Indian arranged marraiges too people are taking time to learn about each other before marriage, which is a sign of evolving society.
1st students opinion I support the arrange marriage.
In an arranged marriage, parents do enquiry about each other family so there is a probability that the marriage will happen in the similar kind of family.
Parents or relatives will think about the future of economic conditions.
The couple most like think about both of their families so they will learn to adjust.
Family and well-wishers are still there if there happens something wrong after marriage.
2nd students opinion In my opinion, both the topics stand equally right. In today's scenario, in arrange marriage, parents give both people ample of time to understand each other before taking a final call. This helps them to understand each other in a better way. While talking about love marriage, the understanding betwen the two persons is very high as they are together for a longer period of time and knows each other in a beter way in every aspect of life.
In my opinion, dealing with the today's scenario where the parents are supportive there is not much difference between the love and arrange marriage because in both of them you get the time to know your partner.
3rd students opinion Hello, my dear friends.
In my point of view, it's very difficult to say which is really better among love marriage and arranged marriage. Both or like head and tails. Sometimes love marriage is better as same time arranged also better in some cases. But marriage is most important part of every ones life. I ll try to explain with an example as we know very well arranged marriages are can be done by parents without knowing their children opinion, we can say its a family forced marriage, but they ll care about them before and after marriage also. They will protect and save them in difficult situations even. But the persons who are going to marry thy don't know each others much. They may face problems after getting married. If come to love marriage both are comfortable with each other because they knew their behavior, tastes, decision making ufcourse everything. So they can live very easily but they might be eliminated by the families in some cases. At that time they might not have much protection. One more point I want to mention as we know now a days the persons who got love married they are also taking divorce then what is the meaning of love and where is the love. Where she/ he wants to go ? This we can see in arranged marriage also. The family save them. Finally, I'm concluding this topic it's difficult to say but I can stick with arranged marriage only. Thank you.